eternal rain

some days it feels like it rains forever. i sit in this chair at the library and i wonder where everyone has gone. it's a bit of a lonely existence. next semester will not be like this. except for the rain, because of course i cannot control the weather. some days i wish my friends would walk by and it could all be so simple. i wish it wasn't up to me, a lost little puppy just trying to find someone i know to talk to for a while. i've always got so much to say. i will spend forever wishing i could just tell the world everything i think about everything there is to think about. i wish i could do these things, except i am alone in the library wondering where everyone is, why i am alone today. i know i have friends, but where are they? why must it be an endless period of solitude filled with '80s soft rock and pod meets world blaring through my headphones? i don't mind it, sometimes, but i wish it wasn't the case, you know? i'm often turning my head to see who is walking in whenever i see something in my peripheral vision. it's never someone i know. i think i'm consumed with anxiety, sometimes. it's like i'm afraid of seeing someone i know despite how badly and desperately i would like to know just one person who walks through these halls. days go by where i don't see anyone and i feel alone. it isn't my fault, it isn't anyone's. the way the world works sometimes screws me over. where are you, friends? am i supposed to sit here and wait? am i supposed to watch this eternal rain?